


Go the F*ck to Sleep

by sky_blue_hightops



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: (He tries), (coffee bribery is involved), (so what nobody's perfect), Brother Feels, Brotherly Bonding, Brothers, Exhaustion, Fluff, Gen, Good Brother Klaus Hargreeves, No Apocalypse, Number Five | The Boy Needs A Hug, Platonic Cuddling, Sickfic, all the brother tags, ben is so Done with everyone and he has every right to be, five more specifically, tired boys, yep you read that right these losers finally get some positive platonic physical contact
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-07 23:21:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17969993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sky_blue_hightops/pseuds/sky_blue_hightops
Summary: Five isn't sleeping, Ben is concerned, and Klaus is, as always, a puppet to said concerned brother's machinations. (He isn't concerned, nope. Just doing what Ben wants him to. No concern here.)(Who is he kidding of course he's concerned.)





	Go the F*ck to Sleep

He didn't notice at first, but then again...that was what Ben was for.

Said guardian angel ( _devil, more like_ , Klaus thought, shedding an imaginary tear for all the times Ben had pestered him about getting sober and succeeded, rest in peace his flourishing relationship with the bottles in the alcohol cabinet and the baggies of drugs that used to live comfortably in his pockets -  _yeah, okay whatever maaaybe it was worth it in the long run shut up annoying dead brothers are still annoying_ ) sat perched on the end of Klaus's bed, hood up and frown etched in place. It was the Frown of Doom, Klaus decided. It usually meant he or one of their siblings was doing something exceedingly stupid. And this time, well, he was inclined to agree.

"Watch out for him, Klaus. Remember how he gets?"

"Well, no, not really, it's been a reeeally long tiiime-" Ben leveled him with a glare. Klaus sighed. "Yeah, yeah, got it, make sure dear baby brother doesn't keel over from not sleeping because he's too into his training blah blah blah et cetera." He flopped onto the bed beside Ben, draping one arm dramatically over his eyes. "You do realize Five'll get all grumpy if he figures out I'm watching him, right?"

The Glare intensified. "That's really not fair," Klaus pouted, and rolled over on his side. Psh. Brothers. A complicated mess. He gave it a day or two before Five started to get  _real_ snippy with him, and then he could turn around and rub it in Ben's non-corporeal face with a well-timed 'I told you so'.

***

As it turned out, he didn't even need to be worried. Five was too out of it to notice.

"Should we... _doooo somethiiiing_?" Klaus questioned out of the side of his mouth, waving his hands in a vague approximation of the universal 'I have no idea what I'm doing' gesture. He wasn't looking in Ben's direction at the moment but he was  _positive_ the other was either sighing, shaking his head, or facepalming. Maybe all three. Probably all three.

The subject of their combined concern sat at the bar tucked into the dining room at two o' clock in the dead of night, a lone, empty glass before him and his gaze a million miles away. That wasn't really unusual, to be honest. What  _was_ unusual, however, was literally everything else. Five's usual uniform getup was nowhere to be seen, replaced by a ( _gasp_ ) t-shirt and sweats. His hands, wrapped around the cool glass of the tumbler, were shaking. He was slumped over like he hadn't slept in a couple days, and Klaus kinda didn't want to know if that assumption was correct or not.

Aw, man. All Klaus had wanted was a cup of water and to go back to bed. He was really looking forwards to sleeping through the night (read: staring at the ceiling until the insomnia passed). He  _definitely_ wasn't thinking about sneaking out to a bar before the others got up. He eyed Ben from the corner of his eye. Nope. Not at all.

"Just..." Ben heaved an admirably large and long-suffering sigh considering he couldn't, y'know, breathe _._  "...put him to bed. Make him stay there." 

"I think you're forgetting the part where I _can't teleport_ ," Klaus remarked, but moved in for the kill anyways. Five didn't look up to teleporting, either.

Klaus slid up to the bar on his socks, all easy smiles and finger-guns. "Heeeyyy, Five. Any chance you feel like carting your fine self to bed for me?"

The look he got in return was more than an answer. Klaus sworethey all must be related  _somehow_ because he was certain Ben was leveling the exact same 'this- _idiot_ ' facial expression at Klaus's back. "And I'm guessing that's a no. Alright, sorry to cut your 'night out' short but people of your height usually have bedtimes. And, come to think of it, alcohol restrictions." He dropped a hand gently but firmly on Five's shoulder, only to recoil a moment later.

He hissed, wrinkling his nose in concern. "You're really hot!" Five merely raised an eyebrow, looking about two seconds away from teleporting to somewhere far away and devoid of human interaction, had he had the energy to do so. He rolled his eyes, flailing a hand out to wave it dismissively. "No, not like that and you know it. You're burning up."

"And?" Five  _would have_ nailed the whole 'either stop talking to me or die' inflection had his voice not have cracked on the 'a'. Klaus stifled a laugh.

"And...you're going to bed."

"Nope."

"Are we really gonna do this  _right now_?"

"Yes."

"Ughh." Klaus dragged a hand down his face. Why did he care again? Caring about people took so much  _effort_. "Please? Pretty please?"

Dead silence. Five swirled the non-existent dregs in his glass, the perfect picture of a person bored with the conversation they're currently in. Klaus had to give it to him, he was a truly _awful_ conversational partner. "PrettypleaseandI'llmakeyoucoffeeinthemorning?"

Five narrowed his eyes. "How much."

Klaus took a moment to pretend to think, firmly unwilling to contribute anything less than peak dramatics to any exchange of words at any given time. "Two cups."

A further narrowing of the eyes. "A pot."

"Two cups and a heavily caffeinated mug of tea." He decided to leave out the part where it had honey and lemon in it, and oh, wasn't caffeinated at all. What Five didn't know wouldn't hurt him. This time.

Five huffed a breath, already swinging his short 'lil legs down from the stool. "Fine. 'M going. Go away."

Ben gestured after Five as if to say  _go with him he's a lying liar who lies_. Which...was true, actually. He still remembered that one time when they were eight and Five had talked him into a poker game...

Oh, right, Five. He scrambled to catch up, all long clumsy limbs and no sense of balance, sliding out into the hallway just as Five crumpled to a heap at the bottom of the stairs.

"I told you s-"

" _Ben_ ," he hissed. "Kindly shut the _f*ck_ up."

***

He papped Five on the cheek a couple times, sitting with his knees tucked into his chest on the very bottom stair. The younger had barely stirred in the ten or so minutes since his abrupt descent to unconsciousness, his only signs of life the soft puffs of his breath against Klaus's ankle and incoherent rambling mumbles. "Hey. Hey, Five. Beds are better than floors, can confirm."

Nothing. "Can't you pick him up?" Ben crouched down on Five's other side, hand hovering over Five's hair.

Klaus grimaced, making a move to get up. "Ew. Physical exertion. No, thanks."

"You either pick him up or spend all night here with him."

"A _llll_ righty then!" Klaus grinned with fake cheer, clapping his hands together. "Here's to hoping I don't drop him from the top of the stairs by accident!"

" _Please_ don't drop him."

"No promises!" He intoned in that same cheery voice. He slipped one hand under Five's knees and the other under his shoulders, and heaved.

By some miracle he was able to lift Five to chest-height, swearing the entire way. The first few steps he ascended were pure spikes of anxiety ( _he couldn't see his feet oh no what if he actually_ did _drop Five_ ) until he finally got the hang of it and Ben stopped looking like he was legitimately going to manifest physically by himself from pure fear over the future integrity of Five's spinal column.

A few short minutes and muscle memory took Klaus straight to the door of Five's old room, catching his own tired reflection on the doorknob in the dim moonlight of the hallway. After a brief crisis over how to open the door ( _hello, no free hands_ ) he finally cracked it open and pushed it the rest of the way with his foot.

Five must've dusted since his return, because it looked not a day older than how it had looked when he had left that first, fateful time. The bed, precisely made, was outfitted with the same blankets and  _everything_. It was creepy. Klaus shivered. And cold. Geez, was that a draft?

Five trembled in his arms, as if to prove Klaus's point. Yeah, no. This wouldn't work. He left the dark, dreary,  _Five-y_ room behind in favor of his own well-lived, well-loved abode. Room. Same difference.

His bed was a mess, blankets strewn haphazardly and dirty and clean laundry alike coating the floor like a carpet, but it was warm and wow, suddenly he was really tired. No laying wide awake tonight, he realized with joy.  _Hah! Suck it, insomnia._

He dropped Five gently on the bed, his brother's still form bouncing once on the mattress before settling. Five seemed to instinctively mold himself into the blankets, unconsciously realizing there was comfort to be had from the many soft things lining Klaus's bed. Klaus slipped into bed beside him, tugging and rearranging quilts over the two of them before flicking his lamp off and plunging the room into darkness.

Klaus was content with letting Five have his own half of the bed, but an unconscious Five was apparently one without useless ideas of being 'tough' and 'stoic' and as such was one to do things like instantly curl into Klaus's side and snag a handful of his brother's shirt. Klaus was mildly surprised, appreciative of the contact, and perhaps most importantly, too tired to really think much of anything at all. He pulled Five closer with an arm slung around Five's shoulders and promptly conked out.

Ben rolled his eyes and settled onto the edge of the bed. _Idiots_ , he thought. _My idiots._

**Author's Note:**

> as it turns out i really like writing klaus, who knew


End file.
